||[Jan. 17th, 2007|12:48 am]
Discipula sum, literata ero... Ergo studere ibo.
One of those nights...|
Bet I come out of UEA with a 2(1), despite my very hardest, best efforts. I know there's nothing at all wrong with a 2(1), but I wanted to earn that first so bad... for myself, more than anything.
Bet nobody really thinks I'll do well in grad school.
Bet I don't get into grad school.
Bet I'll never be able to read Latin as well as I should be able to already.
Bet I'll never make anything of myself, and don't deserve to anyway.
Bet I'm looking for upbeat answers to self-pity? You bet. At least I'm honest!
As long as you try your hardest you can't blame yourself.
I identify with you. I keep thinking no matter how hard I work I'll never even get a 2:1 overall. Like I'll work hard on an essay but when it's returned there's so many mistakes, some embarrassing!
If you have what's expected to apply to Yale and Cambridge then I'm sure you'll do well and get accepted onto a masters degree. :) I bet loads of Historians can't speak a word of Latin. Especially as it's not taught in state schools here.
I hear you on the first angst. I got a 68 overall on my MA. So close. So. Fucking. Close. Not as bad as my friend Chad, though. He got a 69.
Also, if *I* can get into grad school, you can. Please.
And I'll let you in on a trade secret: I'm pretty sure NONE of us can read Latin as well as we should be able to already. We just fake it. :)
Of everyone I know, I think you'd do best in grad school.
Which means you have to get in because I already know people who are (in top schools in their field, too)
Which will help you read Latin better.
Which will help you make something of yourself (I always imagined you a writer)
Those are my answers to self-pity. Thanks for being honest. If you need more help, watch "Let's Nab Oprah" and see if Riley's exploits don't cheer you up.
You can only do your very best, and the key is to be happy with that. If you have a 2(1) it'll still be fine, and it'll still be a good grade. And of course you WILL get into grad school, there's no way someone who's as passionate and smart as you are will not. (but even if you don't get into any of the ones you applied for, come to Holland, it's easy to get into ma's and the like here, and they're still good ;)).
Reading latin is pretty damn hard, especially medieval latin and so it's not weird that it takes a lot of effort, and a lot of time. Don't worry about it, no one expects you to be a genius!
Try to feel better. x
Ooh,ooh,how much are you willing to bet?? I'll take you up on this bet. Specifically #2
, and #5
you've already lost on, never bet "nobody" thinks something. There's always going to be one person that thinks something, like ooh the dog knows how to speak and the world is going to end in 50 days after the attack of the flying pigs (even if it is ridiculous and the result of paranoid schizophrenia... ) Anyway, um, I have no idea my point. Except, be patient, you are getting there, and you will get there. I know it.